Soul Spire Springs
by Punishment Prez
Summary: This story is re-edited! The cast of SC3 is invited to a grand opening a new Hotel: 'Soul Spire Springs'. Just what is the true nature behind this get together--there is no such thing as a free hotel! Yaoi/Yuri Galor.A str8 couple as well; maybe 2!
1. Chapter 1: Come One, Come All!

?!: Hmm, It seems I have nothing slick to say, aww man..

Talim: Explain the damn story then!

?!: What the hell?

Zasalamel: Wow, you really have to be a dirt bag to make Talim pms on you, jeez...

?!: But I- gets smacked by a Weight Owww! Hey you little- That thing actually hurt! rubs head Oww, how the hell? You're smaller than me and you carry those things like it's air. Anyway... On this story, everyone gets in free to the hot springs!!

Maxi: Yay, I gets to be nikkid?

?!: Yep! Buck nikkid.

Ivy: And how on earth did we all happen to get tickets free to the same hot springs?

?!: ...

Yun-Seong: The plot of this seems to sound extremely familiar... sounding proper?

Abyss: Sounds like Mamotte! Lollipop.

?!: STFU Abyss. And how the hell did all of you get in my house?!

Everyone else: ...

?!: Okay then, who is not here? Isn't it just random that you are the only ones here?

Talim: The btch has a point..

?!: Grrr...

Maxi: I know how I can make everyone feel better...

Ivy: WAHHH! Put your clothes back on!!

Abyss: Whoo! Look at that ! Shake, don't break it-

Yun-Seoung: -Took ya mama nine months to make it!

Zasalamel and Talim: And took Li Long 3 minutes finish.

?!: Naww, that's so cold...

XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDD

**Chapter One**: Come One, Come All!

Siegfried was so tired.

I mean you probably would too if you weren't taking your medication and you were running through the woods because of some rapist in azure armor was constantly after you. Even if he really wasn't so you just ran for nothin'. Poor, poor beautiful bishie madman.

So of course it scared the ht out of him when some masked man came up to him in the armor shop.

"Namuuu!"the masked man said cheerfully. "Chi? Who are you..." Great just what Siegfried needed now. Another psycho. At least he wasn't in any armor ready to kick or rape his .

This guy had some flag on his back.

"My name is of no importance in this matter. I have randomly selected great warriors, such as yourself, to come relax at my boss' spa." Something about it was weird, but then again, Sieg fried's entire life was like that. "Otay! Who are your boss'?"

"Right now, thay are currently at the spa, getting it ready for the grand opening tomorrow. Won't you spend the night at our exclusive hotel? All expenses paid."

Absolutely nothing to lose?

"Fine, you got me. I'm-" "Oh, I know, you are the great bishie knight: Siegfried!"

"Yeah, so where is the hotel sir?" "Not far, follow me outside."

They headed towards a carriage that took them toward downtown. The area seemed to grow more modern each block. After about 40 minutes (the horse was speedin'!), they arrived to a luxurious palace like foundation. It looked like the home of an imperial lord, Siegfried thought.

Yes it was grand. And even more so on the inside.

"Ahh! Siegfried, this is Hualin, one of my boss' I was telling you about," the mystery man informed.

"Welcome! Here are is the key to your suite," She handed him the key. Room 13. Aw Shonen! It was Thursday the 14th. Valentines day too! Nooooo! His room was a-

"It's a Love Suite, by the way, enjoy!" Hualin ended cheerfully before running (skipping gleefully) into the room behind her desk.

Siegfried was so stunned that he didn't even notice that The Mask also scampered behind the door as well.

He was all alone...whimper

"I have got to get to safety! Nuthin' gon' happen if I just go to my room." He started running as fast as his armored legs could take him down the wide, rose pink walls. Complete with decorative red/black roses. Order available through Myspace.

Thankfully, no one was out of their rooms-/No damn fangirlsor boys.../- to terrorize him. Finally, the man got to his room (second floor after all...) "Yay! I wasn't attacked!"

He threw his sword by the heart-shaped bed, (I don't think he carries anything except for-) and his coin purse, (wtf?) in a drawer of; yes. A red heart-shaped dresser. Basically everything was red,pink, or black. How uncomfortable.

But nothing like what is about to happen next...

"What the hell are you doing in here?!" Siegfried yelled.

Nightmare had just exited out of the bathroom. (With a towel over his armor wtf dude?)

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

_**Hualin**_: "You did it Yoshimitsu, now all we have to do is wait; everything will work itself out."

_**Mystery 1**_: "With a few pushes every now and then, heh heh heh!"

_**Mystery 2**_: "Then what?"

_**Yoshimitsu**_: "Yeah then what? All I wanted is some apple juice..."

_**Mystery 2**_: "Me too! I loves me some apple juice!"

_**Hualin**_: " You idiots!"

_**Mystery 1**_: "Don't worry yourself, I tried that hours ago..."

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

The Enigma...The Man of Time...

Was scouting the area of the hotel. Why? Because he needed a nice view for research. What is his research? Let's find out...

"Yes, this is going to be a perfect view!!" Zasalamel whispered excitedly to himself. The tree he had scaled up had to be over 10 feet tall. He was like some weird, perverted kitty (Meow!). He had a great view of rooms 13 through 20. And he wanted to see some couples for action for-

"Research! Yes for my new book. What will I call it, hmm... Oh boy, maybe some girls will be making out, or some odd couple, hahhahah..." wipes nosebleed

"Oh hey, what going on in Room 20?"

XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDD

?!: Well, well, well. Looks I'm going adlib on this one.

Tira: What do you mean by 'this one' silly? You do that on every story...

Cervantes: And they're all pitiful...And rated Arrgh!

Kilik: I agree-gree!

?!: Shut up Tira, you bisexual rapist! Shut up Cervantes you butt-pirate! And shut up Kilik you sex starved monk!

Tira teary eyed: I-I didn't want anyone to know 'cuz thay'll hate me!! WAHHHH! runs away

Cervantes shocked: How did you know, how'd ya know I was gay? Is it that obvious?

Kilik: I'm not a monk! And I'll have you know that I have sex with lots of guys...What's a bisexual?

?!:Uhhhhh...Sorry?

XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDD


	2. Chapter 2: Grand Night

?!?: Part 2! Never Will I Quit!

Xianghua: That's the spirit!

Mitsurugi: Don't encourage her, she'll keep on writing...

?!?: Fudge you, Mitsubishi piece of crap.

Cassandra: That's mean even to me. Fuck! Mitsubishi?

?!?: Cassandra! Did you just say the 'F' word?

Cassandra: Mitsubishi?

Mitsurugi: No, she's talking about 'fuck', you can't say 'fuck' you fucking dumbass!

?!?: Mitsurugi!

Cassandra: Why the fuck not?

?!?: Cassandra!

Xianghua: Dude, you just said fuck again!

?!?: Xianghua!

Amy: Fuck!

?!?: Amy!

Cassandra: What's the big deal, it doesn't hurt anybody? Fuck, fuckity, fuck fuck fuck!

?!?: How would you like to go see Counselor Sophitia?

Cassandra: How would you like to suck my-

* * *

Chapter 2: Grand Night!

* * *

_Outside:_

(Well, we left off with Zasalamel, the perv. He OOCness should be familiar to that of...Oh never mind.)

The man with an incredible sense of sight and hearing, was peering at an upstairs room."Oh yeah, what is going on in Room 20? Lover's quarrel?" Of course, he was well off the mark.

* * *

_Roomy 20: _

"I thought I told you the Rules before we came here? Jeez, do you ever listen to a word I say?" Silence on the other's part. "Are you listening Amy? Come on, so you saw the woman more than a few times. The b*tch has two men on her leash and you still want to-"

"Don't...Call her that..." The otherwise quiet teen said.

"I call her what I want. I don't want you to go anywhere near her room, you heard me?" Silence again. "Yes Raphael...Father..." "Now, I want you to get some sleep. If you need me, I'll be in Room 27, just down this corner past the elevator. No girls--Or boys! Or I will break them!!!" But he ended, almost mockingly, "Sweet dreams, Amy dearest."

_Slam_! He swiftly left the room.

Amy quickly assessed the situation. Although, it didn't seem like it, she was damn sharp. And especially when it came to getting what she wanted. Now, how to get to the beautiful mistress...No...Xianghua was her name..."Dammit!" The red-head pounded her fists into the queen-sized pink dressed bed.

She knew that Raphael loved her, but he could really be a b*tch. If only he could get a girlfriend...Wait, never mind. By his clothes and gesture, he might very well be gay. To hook him up with someone would be..Quiet a task. So the girl focused on escape first...

* * *

_Over in Room 5..._

"They gave you a very pretty room, Xianghua." The sexy monk, Maxi strutted (overly sexy people do not walk like us normal people...) over to the adorable doll-house like bed. This room had everything pink and white. **Creepy Barbie Theme**...(Available now for only 99.99!)

"True, it suits your character..." said the equally sexy companion, except although he wasn't as self-wary of it as Maxi. "Maxi--the hell are you doing in the bed?" Xianghua asked stifling back a laugh; Maxi wasn't paying attention. "Le' me lone, bed comfy!" He curled his body up cutely. "You can't say no to me, can you?" ***Pouty Sexy Ferret Stare Ho!*** . "Actually, it's pretty easy. Hell no Maxi, I really need a break from our last fiasco. Because of you, we always wind up in some weird situation!" Maxi was devastated (not). "Oh really, like what?"

"That time we was chased by that mutant gerbil," Xianghua began.

"Now that was hilarious!" Maxi admitted.

"Alright, I'll leave,leave Xianghua to her perfect room," sighed the man without receiving a reply. "Kilik, please take care of him, he only listen to you!" Kilik chuckled and scratched his messy hair modestly. "Sure! We'll have a great day tomorrow, I promise Xianghua." They both turned to leave. As she shut the door, Xianghua could only think how odd it was Maxi loved her room. For some horrible reason, she imagined him wearing extremely frilly lingerie...Oh God...

At least she had that beautiful gal to think about. Xianghua knew what room she was in, but knowing those two, they'll be back over here in no time [maybe with a drunken monk]. "Aww to hell with this! Kilik needs to babysit that man for a bit!" Its high time Xianghua had that red-head in her bed!

* * *

_Roomy 19... _

Ivy was beginning to get annoyed. She was quite sure the voice she was hearing was Raphael. She felt like letting Valentine rip his head off. "Then again, maybe I'm annoyed because--" (You haven't had anyone to 'torture' in a looong timeee....) "**Shut up you desperate dirtbag of a voice!**" (Otay!)

"Honestly, what type of pervert.." She got up and went over to the window. "Spies on people-" Her train of thought was cut off by a large sexy African peeping in her window. They were both frozen, like being caught in the headlights of an oncoming sixteen-wheeler.

* * *

_Outside:_

"Holy shit!!!!" Zasalamel fell out the tree with a major nosebleed. Ivy however for all of her brains was dumbstruck. She was (for once) putting on a regular shirt, but was halfway in the process. "Oh my goodness, I have to see if he's okay!!!"

_/ Lacy....Soooo lacy...._/ was all Zasalamel could repeat in his brain trauma.

* * *

_Room 9_

Boy the set up in this place sure is odd. Now there is a double jointed room, but they are both the same...number? Even to Cassandra that didn't make much sense. Or the fact that they had to put her with an even stranger looking dude by the name of Lizardman! *Knock Knock!* "Freak me Freddy, who could this be?" Cassie was just about to watch wrestling and here come some ass!

"Hello! Did you order some...Ugh, dinosaur hearts?" the room service girl lifted the platter. "Ack! It's alive!" Somehow blood squirted out onto Cassandra's pajamas. "Wrong door, dunderhead!!!" Cassandra angrily pointed to the left of her. "Oh I'm sorry sir or ma'am!" The retart scurried off. Time for some peace and-_** What... DA FUCK happened to the T.V!!!**_"

Needless to say, Cassandra won't be relaxing.

///////*////////

_Room 9-A_

"Nom, nom nom nom.... ummm, nom, nom..." (eating.)

* * *

_Some unknown room #..._

"MwhahaHA! What a sucker! I'm gonna rip off everyone in this whole damn hotel!" Taki! How could you! "What did you expect, why not steal, Namco doesn't pay me enough for wearing these tights honey!" Taki continued basking in her stolen treasures on her ultra round white bed. She had in mind to steal gold far more precious though...

* * *

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Myst. 1: Let's just take a look in on everyone shall we, until tomorrow, not much will heat up.

Yoshimitsu: How do you know if things ever will?

Myst. 3: Yeah, you never put them in the same room, how will the people get to each other?

Hualin: ...How do you two know about the plan that thoroughly?

Myst. 2: Kihihihi, isn't that something? Spy time!

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Room 1- Absent? The hell he went? (Did he even show up yet?)

Room 5- Thinking and pacing for once in her life.

Room 9 A- Pissed off, no T.V.

Room 9 B- Hey, is that our servant Cecilia getting her head eaten off? Hard workers are so hard to come by these days...lol

Room 13- Why is Nightmare wearing a towel? Siegfried: wtf? O.o

Room 19- Where the hell she runnin' to?

Room 20- *Frustrated Grunt Ho*

and Room 28 - Let's just say a "baser" is in there...

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

* * *

_ Room 13:_

_Directly upon seeing Nightmare..._

"**AHHH! I DID ALL THAT RUNNING FOR NOITHING!!!**" This dude really had some lungs on him! "Aww, you missed me, you're too kind! Give me a lil' sugha!" Nightmare began to make kissy noises. "Get away from meeeeh!" Siegfried hollered and zoomed out the door.

"He'll come back...They always come back."

[Narrator: _No, they don't._]

+++= ;)

"Where exactly am I running to," Siegfried asked himself out loud. He stopped abruptly, because he had in fact left his possessions in the room, so he would have to return. (Nightmare: "I toldja!"). "Haaah, alll that running, I'm soo thirsty and hungry! I could of had room service, but maybe there is a dining room-" He did not have any monies on him, so how was he to buy food? [_He forgot everything was free._] "Schie! (Translation: Shit!)"

Then mad heavy steps flew from around the corner behind him! "Eeek!" He ducked out of sight behind a vending machine. It was Raphael storming around the corner. He immediately spotted Siegfried, because his armor was so noticeable.

"Sir, what are you doing? Running away from some mad rapist monster, ha heh," he chuckled at his last thought. "As a matter of fact, I am! Can you please allow me to use your room- just to hide and formulate a plan?" _/I like where this is going!/_ "Of course, you unfortunate man! follow me..." He gestured with his lengthy arms gracefully. _/Enter the lair of love...MWHAHAHAHAHA- *cough* *cough*/_. [_How can you cough telepathically?_]. "**SHUT UPPP!**" Raphael blurted aloud. "Sir, are you okay?" Siegfried electric-blue eyes filled with worry. "Sure, sure, sometimes I hear voices is all." Raphael couldn't help but stare at him. _/He looks adorable like that.../_ Siegfried sighed his relief, "Oh, good, that happens to me all of the time!"

* * *

_Outside:_

"Excuse me sir! Please oh please! Are you alright?!"

Zasalamel's head was killing him, and his head was groggy, but he thanked the Lord above his vision was not 20/20 but 80/80, Ivy was kneeling over him to see if he was alright; and it was quite a sight."Yessss, I'm perfectly fine now..." he was still a bit out, but he'll live. "Can you walk, or do you need me to get assistance? We'll get you to a hospital-"

"Oh no!" He sat up quickly. If he were to leave, how was he supposed to complete his report?! "Thank you very much, I'm sorry I frightened you, I'm just a local photographer needed for a few shots of this grand hotel. What's your name? I'm Zasalamel." He held out a dark hand pleasantly. "Valentine... You can call me Ivy though, you can get situated in my room if you want; it's getting chilly out here..." she rubbed her arms, and that wasn't the only way you could tell she was cold from her thin shirt. _/Heheheh, the rest of the report can wa~it!/_

* * *

_Room 10_:

Maxi let out an exaggerated yawn, and stretched across his magnificent bed. _/Boring.../_. All of the colors were a bit serious and masculine: strong navy blue, lined with gold and silver, like military colors. Kilik walked in behind him and set down his belongings on the single mattress adjacent from his friend. "I didn't expect you to like Xianghua's room so much Maxi!"Kilik could tell when any of his friends switched moods. "Well, I just liked being in the room because, five is my favorite number..." [Narrator: Quick wits ran in his family...]

The pirate felt like changing subjects."Want to order room service? I even snagged a few coupons!" He whipped out a couple of slips to show that food was going to be cheap tonight! "Maxi! What did we say about stealing from where we're setting up for a while?! We have a free discount anyway!" [_These people cannot believe when anything is free._] Maxi was bound to get them kicked out, and it wasn't even the third chapter yet. Said man put a contemplative hand to his chin, "Why.... Okay, I got nothing...". He rolled over with cat-like agility off of the bed; he was starting his pleading mode.

He put a *_brotherly_*, tight arm around Kilik's neck. "Aww, you can't stay mad at me! Can you?" He was incredibly close, so when Kilik turned his head, their faces nearly met.

"Don't push me...Well I guess it's alright, but only this time Maxi! Next time, I'll string you up by the fingers!"He was pretending to be stern, but a smile was hidden in his eyes. At this, Maxi feigned gratefulness. "Thank you, oh thanks bro!" He put Kilik into a close headlock, giving me a rub on the head. "Hey~! Gahh!" Kilik yelled out. Kilik, trying to knock him off, spiraled both of them around the room; they were a laughing mess! /_This is my chance.../_ in their fooling around; Maxi pulled Kilik in a close hug, and lightly kissed him on the cheek.[_He is __**so**__ damn fresh!_]

"Wha-?" Kilik suddenly broke the lock he was in. _/Uh Oh! /_ The saintly man before Maxi's eyes was holding his head down, with a hand on where he place his lips. /_Might as well 'fess up.../_ The Elvis-haired man walked up to his long time crush."Kilik," when he was close enough to the cloaked man (Yes, I put him in a jacket) warrior, Maxi took both of his hands into the other's. "Before you murder me Soul Calibur Style, I want you to know...I've been in love--" *HUG*! "Ki-lik?" Kilik was either trying to bear hug him to death, or fanboyishly clinging to him!

"I want you too..." Kilik whispered into his ear. "I've just always been afraid Maxi..."_ ///He was afraid? Afraid of what?///. _"Well, promise you won't laugh?" Up until now, he was nestled shyly into Maxi's vest. "Why would I dare laugh at you?" Maxi asked seriously as he lifted his chin up by the fingertips. He was closer to those lips he'd only felt in his dreams... "Tell me Kilik."

"I've never kissed anyone before Maxi."

**O.o**

?!?: I'm finally done after--*g_ets smacked by a Rapier sword_*

Raphael: Do you-*_whap_*-know how long-*_smack_* we've been **waiting!!!???**

?!?: OWW! (X..x) I didn't mean it! *_whispering_* I was not even going to finish this--

Nightmare: **What did you just say?!**

?!?: *_Help?_*

Raphael and Nightmare: Let's team up, just this once!

**MWHAHAHAHAHA!**


	3. Chapter 3: More Peeps and Treats!

?!?: I almost gave up, but between Raphael and Nightmare, I can't even think about that know!

Siegfried: *_In an amazingly GIR like voice_* I know what you mean... *pats ?!? on the head*

Lizardman: *licks* "Hssss...(Translation: Don't feel bad...)"

?!?: You guys are right! *_filled with strength_*

Siegfried: You can do it!!!

Lizardman: RAWR!

Yoshimitsu: *_Peeks into the room_* That will do pig, that will do... [I'm not Babe...wtf?]

**Chapter 3:** _More Peeps and Treats!_

_/So damn annoyin'!/ _

Mitsurugi almost thought out loud. That Idiot of the Year Yun Seong was hiding in the bushes of a pathway he was following down. Why does he stalk him? He just **_insists_** that Mitsurugi is an unknown threat to the world. At the moment, you can see him trying to disguise his fashionable clothes with a few branches; it was crappier than usual. So instead, Heishiro sighed out loud; at least the hotel he was going to was a freebie, that weird po-go sword guy working there told him so.

.

/_He'll_ _never see me in this place! I told Seong Mina and Talim I'm a genius!_ /

[Narrator: _True, they didn't because he was a natural born retard._]

Yun was behind (elusively he would add) a decorative boulder near the front of the Soul Spire place that (unbeknownst to Mitsurugi) he was also staying at. Mitsurugi would not get away with his crimes! More importantly, he would never get away from Yun for the obvious reason: the young man adored him.

.

After calming himself, the built man walked through the doors of the modern palace.

"Good evening warrior! You are the one named Mitsurugi, correct?" The most gorgeous maid that you will ever see greeted him with a smile. "Yeah," he simply responded gruffly. Who was this velvet-red haired maiden with ginormous boobs!? "My name is Valeria, Yoshimitsu scheduled you for this suite," she handed a key to Room 7. She was looking at the door behind him that closed with a *_thunk_*. Yun Seong had stealthily (fallen) through the doors (playing it off as though he somersaulted inside), and he had an envious look on his face.

"Good evening, I believe that **I **was the one scheduled for that suite, it is the casino themed one, right?" He was wearing a smirk on his face as though he won something. He didn't want Mitsurugi to look at her like that; but no one could help **but **stare at her chest, even a straight woman would stare.

"You are absolutely correct sir! You are Yung and unfortunately since the booking was full, both of you have the same room... Please forgive the inconvenience." She pulled another key set from her pocket (which had a dice for a key chain) and handed it to the younger of the two."Both of you please enjoy your night; breakfast will be in our dining room in the morning at nine o'clock." "Is it free?" they both said at the same time.

"Yes; we are a non-profit organization, only the gift of your company is our joy." She headed to the back door behind her desk. "Works for me," Mitsurugi left out through another door leading to the rooms leaving Yun by himself. /_Damn slut! How dare she look at Mitsurugi like that?!_/ "Hey! Wait up!" Yun chased behind him, open jacket flying in his hurry.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Valeria: What do you think about that Hualin? Pretty creative huh?

Hualin: It sure was, those two would have never gotten together if you didn't put them in the same room! Now who else are we waiting for?

Myst. 3: Yes! My name is still a Mystery! I like the sound of that! Mystery, mystery MYSTERY!!

Valeria: Lynette?

Lynette: Yes? Aww, you tricked meee!

*_snickering_*

Yoshimitsu: Don't worry; your real name is prettier anyway!

Lynette: Really?!? Thanks!

Yoshimitsu (all shy and stuff): Yeah!

Valeria and Hualin: Awww! :3

Valeria: Well, Hualin looks like Lynette is growing all up!

Hualin (sniffs): She was the best little Retart ever!!!! You never told me who else is missing Valeria.

Valeria: Mudadada... Patience is a virtue...

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Tira's personality voted that going to the free hotel was a great idea; at least the majority of them ruled that: a few of them voted that: a) her pet crows would get lonely and b) what the hell kind of trouble would we get in by the next morning? Just for one night, she was going to put her violence aside (the next day would be another matter).

**Current Mood**: _Happy!!! :D_

"Ah, a spa sounds just like the right thing I need, that whole damn village pissed me off, too bad I had to kill them so soon!" Earlier, she killed an entire village because in a local restaurant, they gave her the wrong Pepsi...

_Flashback: Burger King _

"What the hell is wrong with you!? It was a simple mistake! We'll get you the right soda!" That was the manager of Burger King telling off Tira because in some magical way, she suffocated an employee with a plastic straw. "He gave me diet soda. **_DIET!_** He was calling me fat!" She grabbed the pretty dark-skinned girl by her red collar. "Do you think I'm FAT!?!" She glared her angry green eyes into brown orbs. "Uhhhh, no?"

[_That was the wrong answer..._]

"**TIME TO GET F^CKED!!!"**

Within a few minutes after that, a village was no more, but they usually come back to life in about an hour, so they will be alright...

* * *

///////*////////

_On a very packed random bus:_

[_Do you remember that Chester dude you have to fight on Tales of Souls? Well he was in charge of transportation of other warriors who were a bit farther off...]_

Chester (on an intercom from the front of the bus): Well people, we have a slight delay up ahead, it seems that a village was destroyed with a thousand people in it, but because this is a game, they will be turning back to life shortly...

Astaroth (from a back seat): But I wanna stop by Burger King!

Cervantes: We get free food at the hotel right? I'm hungrier that a motherf^cker!

Talim (from the front of the bus): Who the hell just passed wind!? And it's not the kind that I shout ridiculously loud either...

Rock: *_kihihihi_* [He passed 'wind'.]

Sophitia: Where the hell is my sister!

Seong Mina: Sophitia, she has been gone since forever! You got Alzheimer's or something?!

Sophitia: Oh. Who is Altimer? Where is Cassandra? I'm always looking for her...

Setsuka: …How the _hell_ did I end up on a bus with these dipstick people?!? [Narrator: The author of the story was pissed off at Setsuka for some unknown act…]

///////*////////

_Back at the hotel… Room 27_

"Well, this is my room, please make yourself comfortable!" Raphael swooped open the door to his suite dramatically for Siegfried to walk through. "Thank you very much, not many people offer me such kindness!" This was true; the only person who offered to let him stay the night without raping him in the process was… Well I guess it was that ninety–year old lady with rheumatism. That was before some freaky accident involving a mutant gerbil on the loose. "Well, are you coming Mr. Schauffen? No need to worry about anything here…" Raphael never felt concern for anyone except Amy, so this was a GIANT leap for him.

"Sorry, I was thinking about that thing that happened a while ago with a mutant gerbil…" Raphael nodded sympathetically. "I remember that. A lot of ice cream was spilt that day, tragic it was…" They bowed their heads in respect for the ice cream that was wasted.

;D

Raphael's sheets looked like the merging of a hundred bras from a Victoria's Secret catalogue: it was just that frilly! Either that or someone owes Prince a new wardrobe. Siegfried kept the thought to himself as he sat on the soothing bed, which was a color between red and pink. For once in a very long time, he set his sword on the far side of the room away from where he rested. "Does it hurt Siegfried?"

"Huh? I'm sorry, does what hurt?" Siegfried turned to where Raphael was leaning sexily against an egg-white wall. _///When you fell from heaven? ...No, too corny! I must think of something else! ///_ "The weight of that armor cannot be good on your body; you should relax while you are here with me." 'Relax' was not in other man's vocabulary. _///Raphael seems concerned… It's kind of cute…///_. Siegfried almost discarded the thought, but then the older man was closer to him than he had anticipated. "I'll remove some of it for you…" Raphael knelt on the bed and began (gracefully he might add) to remove that over-rated heavy armor from the other's shoulders. Underneath it all, he really was small.

"You're stiff as well…" Raphael commented as he set his hands on Siegfried's shoulders, awing at how beautiful his hair was. Using his agile fingers (ooh la _la_) he expertly began to soothe the blonde starting from the base of the neck. Raphael could have sworn he heard him purring (wtf...?). _///He wouldn't mind if I lean into him...///_ Siegfried hesitantly leaned into the older man's chest. And of course, Raphael noticed. "You must be tired," He whispered, and pulled Siegfried close to him so that he could rest on his manly (*cough*) chest. "Better?" He asked Siegfried.

"Uh…" Siegfried's heart pounded; Raphael was so close to his face, with a slight smile. _///What do I say!? What do I say! He's looking right at me…!///_."Siegfried…" Raphael gained a low, sexy tone. He tightened an arm around the young man's waist. "Can I-"

*_GROOwwl…_*

"Ugi?!" That was the adorable (apparently a question-like noise) Siegfried made after his stomach rumbled with hunger. "Damn! You need something to eat…" Raphael chuckled until they both laughed together. "Oh!" Raphael pretended that he just noticed he was holding Siegfried, watching his blue eyes. He got up swiftly, suddenly shy. "Looks like I'll go straight to the dining room and get you something tee hee!" He gets like that when he's nervous. "Raphael, when you get back can I ask you something?" Raphael stopped midway in his frantic strut and door ajar, unwilling to turn around and show his blushing face. "Sure, anything for you friend. I'll be back before you know it." He shut the door behind him softly. "I really like you Raphael." Siegfried whispered when the man left out.

And outside, Raphael let out a school/fanigirl scream of sheer excitement. "HE'S _SO_ **CUU~TTE!**"

* * *

?!?: Done! Are you two happy now!

Raphael: Well done pig.

Nightmare: Yeah, but you need to get to me quick!

?!?: *_angry nerve pops up on head_* Shut up Raphael! I'll get to you Nightmare, I promise!

Zasalamel: When will **I **get some action!?!

Ivy: Action?

?!?: Lol, Ivy you are so _slow_…

Rock: *_from out of nowhere_* What is this 'action' you all speak of? Teach me young warrior!

Ivy: Yes, teach us!

Zasalamel: *_randomly_* Once upon a time, there were two little piggies, but one was a cow.

*_everyone sits for story time as Yoshimitsu brings juice boxes…_*


	4. Chapter 4

Terry Bogard: Okay!

?!?: How the hell did you get your $$ in here?! You're not even _from_ Namco!

Terry: Ugi? Beat up! *_proceeds to beat up ?!?_*

Rock: Wait up young warrior! You must not do that! *_three minutes lat_e*

Terry: *_to ?!?_* Are you okay?!

?!?: Yeah... *_ribs sore as hell_*

Terry: Rock you! *_Gets ready to do some SNK, NeoGeo, KOF or Fatal Fury attack_*

Rock: *_retart_* Yeah, my name is Rock! *_happily jumps in the line of fire_*

Terry: _**BUST WOLF!!!**_

Rock: Owie!!!

?!?: Now you know how 'Weegie'(Luigi) feels!

**Chapter 4:** _Girls, Girls and (yes) Apple Juice!_

"Bye Voldo, my little pet! Have a nice vacation!" Voldo had a brand new master that was in charge of The Greatest Circus on Earth (the Swap Shop) _and_ treated him good (His name be Bojangles) and gave him an extended vacation, to say the very least, he was the best positioned Soul Calibur character (the rest has some retarted conflict going on). Master drove him to a wonderful hotel he heard that was free from his dear friend Yoshimitsu [_that man really travels.._.]. Voldo stepped out of the Volvo and waved his claws. "Hisssss… (Bye master!)" "See ya later Voldo!" he rode off into the sunset [_or was it moonlight, what time is it?_].

"Hi warrior dude," Lynette greeted the 'differently' dressed warrior as he Slinky'ed through the door. "Hey lil' kid…" He greeted her in human language. "Can I has a room pwease? I gots apple juice to sell…" He whipped out a trench coat (like the merchant from RE4) from his suitcase [I don't think he needs one] and put it on. "What are you buyin'?" He flashed it (unnecessarily) and showed jugs of apple juice strapped to the sides.

"Oooh, I gotta tell Yoshimitsu about this; hold on please." She ran to the back door.

3

* * *

_Roomy 5_

Xianghua was relaxed after her Barbie Bath (complete with Pink Mystery soap), and Kilik and Maxi were far away from her thoughts. "I wonder what Amy is like without Raphael," Xianghua pondered as she stretched out onto her bed in her bright-orange mini-skirted pajamas.

*_Knock Knock_* "Just a moment!" Xianghua put on a matching orange robe and answered the door; she didn't want Maxi to pick on her about her chest again.

"Hello, did you order some Goddamn Pizza?"

"No I did—Amy?!?" Yes in the flesh! Not really because she had to disguise herself as a pizza boy (from the Goddamn Industry) which came complete with an awkward mustache! Xianghua literally dragged her into the room and snatched the disguise off of the pretty girl. She set the Goddamn box on the dresser, amazed Amy actually had pizza inside and even that she had her regular skirt outfit under the uniform. _///Goddamn…I thought she would be naked…///_

"Amy, how did you manage to get past your dad?" What an incredible feat! "He had a separate room from me, but I actually saw him near the stairway, yelling about something being cute. Luckily, I had this stuff stashed in my room, and ordered the pizza myself!" They both giggled at the randomness. "Tickle fight!" Xianghua cried and prodded the adorable teen in her side.  
"You're on!" Amy accepted the challenge using her honed fencing skills.

XD ;D

Amy was curled next to Xianghua, the both of them panting with laughter. "You cheated!" gasped Xianghua. "Nuh-uh!" Amy insisted with a smile. _///Xianghua smells really nice…///_ Amy never really had the opportunity to be this close to anyone (except when her Raphael felt like literally suffocating her) and especially a woman. "Hey Amy…" The spirited young woman broke Amy out of her thoughts. She sat up and 'eyed' her, "Have you ever kissed a girl before?"

_///The moment of truth! Why else would she ask me a question like this!?///_

"No, I've never kissed anyone before, since my dad… Well you know..." Amy felt a bit embarrassed by her lack of knowledge. Xianghua seemed unfazed by this fact. "Have you ever wanted to kiss anyone before?" Just the reaction the older woman wanted; Amy's eyes widened with a nervousness only a teen could have. She was an average girl on the inside after all.

"I-If it's alright with you to be my first… Because I've always liked you…" _///There I said it!!!///_ "I know. And I've always adored you Amy…" Xianghua smiled lovingly (stalker-like) with dancing brown eyes. Without another word, she eased herself the lying girl and gave her a sweet kiss on the cheek. She was delighted in how much Amy seemed to enjoy it.

"Xianghua…" she wasn't accustomed to someone hovering sexually over her… But the teen was beginning to get used to it. "Come on top of me, please…" she began pulling on the older one's shirt.

_///I love horny teens!!!///_ Thought the Pervy Sage Xianghua.

* * *

_Outside in the parking lot…_

"I'm glad you've all enjoyed my driving," Chester the Magnificent _[*cough* Molester *cough*_] Driver said to everyone who rode on the Gold Hound bus service. All of the other characters in the lobby did not look very amused. "That, was the worst driving I've seen in my unnatural life. And I'm **dead**," Cervantes said rudely just because he didn't get to stop by Burger King.

"Well, I think you did pretty okay," The main manager of transportation Meiga told the discouraged blonde man. "You didn't even kill anyone this time!" Some of the people who were on board turned around in disbelief. "You tellin' me I coulda **died**?! I'm 'bout to get ratched in this piece!" Yes that was Setsuka of course.

"No, nooo…. I was exaggerating. That's right, ha ha figure of speech…" The man from Chronicles of the Sword laughed sheepishly. [Narrator: He was lying.] "Well, for your entire troubles warrior, how about all of us hit the mess hall, I guarantee 5-star service from our best chefs!" _///Yes, kill them with food…///_ Chester was glad he had the ninja on his team or he would have be f^cked!

"Will there be frosting?" Seong Mina asked. "Why yes, and we have plenty of apple—"

What cut Meiga off were two of his co-workers bursting through the doors of the lobby. But what creeped him out even more was that Lynette and Yoshimitsu high-tailing with jugs of apple juice as Hualin ran after in full pursuit. "Stay away from that stuff," she yelled, but could not keep up with their sugar-high.

"_**I LOVE JUIIICE!!!**_" They both yelled in unison.

Chester and Meiga both turned away from the scene to which everyone else was speechless.

"Nothing to see here. Everyone onside the hotel. Forget….Forget…" Chester said with a wave of his arms as though he had magical powers.


	5. Chapter 5: Tell Me More!

?!?: Hi!!! :3

Zasalamel: Err... Hi?

?!?: How's your porn project coming? Need any editors?

Zassy: How did you know—

?!?: Yeah, I got upz! :P

Zassy: Yeah, as a matter of fact, I do!

Chester: Can I be on teh talk show today!?

?!?: Sure! Would you like to be in the porno book _***holds up a random Playgirl book***_ it fun!

Chester: Well I—

?!? _and_ Zassy: Then it's decided!!! You're hired!

Chester: Great...

Zassy: Oh yeah! We're gonna make millions!

XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDX

**Chapter 5:** _Tell Me More!_

///////*////////

_Room 10..._

Immediately after Kilik's confession, Maxi gave a non-English outburst. (Something like: _**Dgaschwa!!?!)**_

"As sexy and nice as you are, no one has ever kissed you?! Oh, I get it. You're speaking in a metaphor right?" Maxi shifted one of his crazy eyebrows upward. "No, I've honestly never kissed anyone before, my master said that type of stuff was... impure." Kilik finished vaguely as though he didn't really know the answer. Maxi dead-panned at an '_imaginary'_ camera and made a 'Can You Believe It's _**NOT**_ Butter' expression. "Well, that's in the past, and I think going in to anymore details would be pretty awkward for the both of us," Maxi decided.

"Kilik, I want to throwaway every fan girl and boy on this planet to be with only you," Maxi wasn't sure what the hell he was saying, but it sounded sweet. For more romantic effect, he got down on a bended knee and held Kilik's hand. "So please let me show you how to kiss!"

Awww... Kilik felt a new sensation: the type without a name, but it is pretty close to being so happy, you wouldn't have cared if Astaroth forced you to tape his d*ck to your stomach and told you to do a back flip. Yep, he was pretty damn happy.

"Maxi, you don't have to get on your knees, just teach me," Kilik said humbly. He was being humble, but he really didn't know the extent of Maxi's playing around with fan girls and boys. (That man was hit harder than a crack pipe in the 80's). "Thank you Kilik, let's get started then!" Maxi exclaimed once he was on his feet. He magically rolled a big writing board on wheels (from out of nowhere) in front of the bed. He pushed Kilik down into a sitting position (he was a good student and sat down too) and gave the man a notepad and pencil. "If this was any other subject," Maxi said while pulling out his intelligent-looking glasses. "I would call you crazy as hell." He set the glasses over his eyes and shifted his hair.

With a black marker, he wrote at the very top of the board: **Maxi's Guide to the Universe** (_Virgin's Addition!_)

"Let's begin..." Maxi smiled similar to a very wicked Algebra teacher. Smart, but got a little bit evil in 'im!

///////*////////

_Room Lucky # 7_

Mitsurugi had immediately dropped what little items he carried with him, and went straight into the luxury bathroom for an equally luxurious bath. He knew once Yun came in, he wouldn't have a chance to relax. _///Damned kid! Always bothering the hell out of me...///_ Come to think of it, why didn't the red-head ever kill him? He snuck up on him often; he could have delivered a killing blow... "Whatever," Mitsurugi said in a low voice.

**"WHAT DID YOU SAY YOU KILLER?! COME OUTTA THAT BATHROOM AND FIGHT MEHH!!!"**

That dude yells like that for real, no exaggeration on Mitsurugi's part. "S-T-F-U!" Mitsurugi shouted back thinking if he spoke in internet language the younger would understand. "Orly?" Yun asked in intelligent language. "Yarly!" Mitsurugi replied. By now, the diamond-shaped bath tub (which had to be a health hazard) was filled with hot water and bubbles! Mits shrugged his clothes off (he accidentally did it sexily) and hopped in. He moaned with pleasure as the water soothed his bad nerves away (again, he did so accidentally sexy).

Ten minutes later, Yun Seong came up with the great '_idear_' to bust in the door.

"I got you now! There's no way ya can--" Mits looked at him blankly.

"You might as well finish; you **busted** through the door like the damn Yakuza anyway," He told Yun.

But the man was in a state of shock; he just stood there. And then the first drop of blood came from... Yun Seong's nose! "I don't understand; I haven't even hit you, and you're bleeding?" Mits scratched his head, and Yun held his nose. "Sorry!" He ran to the sink to wash away the blood that ran out of his nose faster than the water from the valves of the sink's pipes. "Oh sh*t! Hey are you gonna be okay?!" Mits practically flew over to the sink, the only thing covering him were bubbles and his long black hair. This made the blood flow worse.

"I'm okay... I like synonyms and cinnamons on my toast," He told Mits with urgency. That kinda came from the blood loss, because two seconds later, he fell backwards into Mitsurugi's naked body. "I like ya a lot," He said to the man in bubbles and closed his eyes.

Mits really hoped that part came from the blood loss.

///////*////////

_In the hotel's elaborate dining room..._

Raphael was finally at the window for ordering food, but he never had the chance to ask Siegfried what he wanted. _///I just had to run out like a school girl... Damn it! Not cool!///_ Indeed, Raphael was that nervous. "Hello? What would you like to order this evening? Anything and everything you want is absolutely free," said a cheery voice behind a window (it was blocked off for some odd reason...).

"Oh! What would you suggest for Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise look-alikes?" The male voice behind the window paused, and then it sounded like he asked someone for advice in the kitchen. "One moment sir," the voice called back. "Please wait 10 minutes sir, and your food will be ready," said the man. This service is better than Cafe World on Facebook (don't tell them I said that).

Raph decided to wait in the dining room; he was too embarrassed to go back so soon. He spotted the old pirate Cervantes eating with Tira. "Hi there... What is that substance you two are eating?" Raph asked the two.

"It's called Burger King. Geez Sorel!" Tira said in an exasperated voice, because the man was _soo_ out of style. "It's all the rage in modern human world! Ye should try some," Cervantes offered him a French fry. "No thanks, I had ordered something for me and my new friend." The other two stared at him _**really**_ hard. Setsuka and Talim, whom obviously heard and were also nosy, came over as well. "You have a friend Raph?! Dude..." Talim bit into a Slim Jim. "Tell me more, tell me more!" Everyone began to sing like in that part of the movie Grease (apparently, Raphael was supposed to be John Travolta).

"Um, well his name Siegfried!"

_**"Tell me more tell me more!"**_

"He's look a bit like Brad Pitt!"

_**"Tell me more tell me more!"**_

**"SILENCE!!! HOW ABOUT ALL OF YOU SHUT THE HELL UP!!!!"**

A strong voice commanded from the front of the front of the dining hall. Everyone looked over, and the camera zoomed in on... Nightmare! "The heck? Get that camera out of my face!" He yelled angrily. He pointed (impolitely) over to where Raphael was. "Give. Him. Back. Siegfried is _**MY**_ property!!! He's been my property since..." He counted on his fingers. "I think it was Soul Blade," he decided.

"No, that was Soul Edge," an innocent voice said from behind him.

It was Sophitia, a very hungry Sophitia whose food was ready to be picked up. "Yep. Nightmare, you're talking about Soul Edge; I can vouch for that because I've been in damn near every game," She stepped to the side of him and everyone watched with awe as the goddess walked to the pick-up window. "You ordered the Hungry Hera Special with extra sauce right?" asked the male behind the door. "Yeah that's me, thank you! And may the gods give you a good day!" She looked at everyone else.

"Screw you guys, I'm hungry as hell." She walked right out of the dining room.

"Whatever! Siegfried is mine, and I would appreciate it if you hand him over like the loser you are! Mwhahahaha!"

"No."

"What do you mean 'no'?!"

"Nope. He ran away from you. Just face it Nightmare! He doesn't want to be raped by you anymore!" Everyone gasped._***GASP* **_

"Now we must fight to the death! Hit the lights Rico!" Nightmare commanded.

An assistant named Rico (an average height Columbian with cool black hair) went to the nearest light switched and politely bashed it with a metal baseball bat. Nightmare put his head in his hands. "Dammit Rico!" But the lights did turn off, and a glittery disco ball came down. Rico (from nowhere in particular) tuned his radio to 99 Jamz!

For some reason, I think Rico tuned on to the wrong station, because Futuristic Friday, sounded more like—

"Rico, the hell are you playing? It sounds like R. Kelly got high on crack, took a kid version of Nicki Minaj and went with her to the nearest Taco Bell!" Nightmare asked angrily. It was weird for Hispanic music, so Rico switched it to another station, which (ironically) was playing R. Kelly.

"Oh Bring it _**ON**_ Sorel!" The armored man began to gyrate and dance like it was 1999.

_"Bring what on?"_ Raphael whispered to Tira. _"You have to beat him at dancing, go out there __**you idiot**__!"_ She pushed him on to the floor. _///I don't know how to dance!///_ Raphael had a mini-flash back to when an old woman instructor tried to teach him to waltz and her boobs sagged onto his head, he was that short at the time. It made weird squishy noises. He vowed to never dance with a woman again. Or anything else for that matter.

"Hmp! Let us dance!" The man said determined. He lifted an imaginary sword, just like practice and started 'fencing' away to the song "I'm A Flirt!" This horrible scene ended when Rico threw some water on Nightmare to make him look sexy, but the three of them, by some random act of Zeus, slipped in the water and became a jumbled mess that was similar to Twister Gone Wrong. Cervantes fixed the light switch and turned the lights back on.

"You two are the dumbest people I've met since those jerks who threw tea off of that boat!"

He was in fact, referring to the Boston Tea Party. "And even more so than that dude Johnny Depp played in the Caribbean," (I won't comment on that movie)

He began to assist the three of them off of the floor along with Setsuka and Talim. "But, we're all friends. Nightmare, I think Siegfried is tired of you. There are millions of idiots in the sea, waiting to get caught into yer trap." Cervantes told Nightmare. "Raphael, I don't think Siegfried wants you to fight him; when he takes his medicine, he likes to take things easy. Now I want both of you to apologize," Setsuka ordered like a mom. They did as she pleased.

"Now what have we learned?" Cervantes asked the two of them.

"Um, taking crack and minors to a Taco Bell is wrong,--" Raphael began.

"Unless it is Nicki Minaj," Nightmare corrected Raphael. The two of them agreed, and the rest of them put their faces in their hands.

///////*////////

_In Room 1..._

Zassy and Ivy sat on opposite sides of the bed. It was a very odd room, because it looked very normal (this never occurred often to either of them). "Would you like a drink Mrs. Valentine?" Zasalamel offered. "Sure, but just call me Ivy; I'm not married," Zassy face went something like: O.o . _**///DAAAAMMMMMNNNNN!!!///**_ He fixed his face. "Get out of town! If it were up to me, I would have hauled you off to the nearest church by now!" The both of them laughed at this. _**Soooo corny...**_ Ivy wondered what the hell was wrong with her; normally she would have sliced his head off by now. "What about you?" She asked him. "I'm single too, just haven't found someone to outride me yet." He continued pouring dry gin into two cups. Icy had mistaken him (she has a negative mind). Zasalamel had meant 'live longer than me', not what she had in mind.

"R-really? I've been known to go on forever!" Ivy exclaimed.—

"_**OFF THE HIZZY!!!"**_ Yelled a random voice as it burst through Zassy's room door.

_Will this raucous random rebel be revealed?_

_Will Zassy and Ivy be in complete terror?_

_And when will this perilous pious plot thicken?_

Find out the answer tomorrow. Same Bat time; Same Bat Channel

_***Bat Man Theme Song***_

XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDX

?!?: Well that was fun! OH by the way, Rico is my character; not Nightmare's!

Rico: It's true… I hate my life.

Siegfried: (sounding like GIR again) I know what you mean…

?!?: Shut up Lil' Hitler!

Siegfried: What the schiezen are you talking about!?

?!?: You too Fidel Castro!

Rico: Now what did me do? You know what; you just don't pay me enough!

Batman: Don't be using my song without my consent bitch! _***slaps ?!?***_

R. Kelly: It's about to be a _WHAT?!?—_

Rico: **GIRL FIGHT!!!**

_***Everyone watches Batman and ?!? fight***_


	6. Chapter 6: Damn Plot Plotters!

?: Yo~! Can you hear mee!

Sophitia: Hi! :3

?: Aww, you're so adorable! Your husband's so lucky~!

Sophitia: What husband?

?: _*laughs*_ You are _sooo_ funny!

Sophitia: _*confused*_ No seriously, what husband? I never got married… I have an uncle named Rothion and my little cousins live with him and—

Seong Mina: Ummm, Sophitia… It was a joke! Yeah, that's right a joke! Ha ha ha… _*whispers to ?*_ She has Old Timer's…

?: Ohhh. Alright then.

Taki: _*Frusterated Grunt Ho!*_ Hmph!

?: What's wrong Taki? Are you jealous? Aww that's so—*_head falls off shoulders*_

Seong Mina: Don't you think you went a little overboard? I mean, isn't it true? Didn't have to cuttin' off people's heads…

Taki: _*looks at the twitching author*_ No… I think I did just fine! ;3

**Chapter 6**_**:**____Damn Plot Plotters!_

Chester and Meiga could be seen walking to the food lounge together. It's been a while since either of them had a chance to relax; what with the bus driving _{Chester},_ activity operating _{Meiga},_ and mild retardation _{entire SC3 cast}._

Both of them grabbed a handle of the double doors leading to temporary freedom and after five seconds of seeing the horror of Raphael and Nightmare covered in 'stage water' and dancing to the death, they quietly shut the doors, turned around slowly, and stepped away.

"Yeah…Anyways," Meiga said after an awkward silence. "What do you think of the hotel's plot line?" Chester rubbed his chin. "I like how they use the methods of direct, indirect, coincidence, intentionally, unintentionally and accidentally bring couples together. Hell, we all need some type of love in our lives," the brunette smiled. This was the best job he'd been a staff on in his entire life. _/Aww, he's so cute! And that scar on his face makes him extra sexy! Oh no, get a hold of yourself man! Do not go fanboy!/_

"Have you ever found love Chester?" It was an intense moment for the young samurai before he received the answer.

"Naw, I guess no one's interested in an evil has-been like me," the man chuckled good-naturedly. Meiga stopped walking, and when the other man continued on (oblivious the other had stopped), the samurai pulled the (prince?) by the hand to stop. "What's wrong Meiga? I know Nightmare freaked you out back there, but—"

"I'm interested in you, Chester. I just never asked because I wasn't sure if you were… Well, of the same persuasion…" Meiga stumbled, he was suddenly shy. "But I've always had a feeling for you stronger than just royal respect; even when you used to pwn my team members' asses!" Now Chester's eyes' widened.

"Even when I blatantly cheated?"

Meiga held open his arms for a sexy, manly hug. "Even then," he replied. And they embraced.

Voldo walked to the side of them, and in front of a free vending machine to obtain a few extra apple juices; since the 'two from earlier' bought out his entire stock.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

"Yosh!"

That was Valeria looking at one of the many Perv Cams posted throughout the whole hotel. "Which attack is it this time?" Hualin asked without looking up from her book _{How to Get the Slightly Retarded/Dense Chick}_. "I can't believe it! Two co-workers; Meiga and Chester… I'll say it's Unintentionally Accidentally Direct, but it's a hit nonetheless!" She laughed with joy at the love in the air.

Hualin just turned another page, smiling at Valeria's exclamations. _/She's so dense…/_ The woman thought as she adjusted her glasses.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

/*/

_Room 28…_

_/I'm starving!/_ Sophitia's stomach growled as the aroma from her bag of food wafted in the air. She was finally ready to eat after such a wild ride to get here. In the elevator, she noticed a poster for an activity that will be taking place tomorrow. "Hmm, 'Nuke 'Em Ball'. Whatever could that game be?" Sophitia wondered out loud. Whatever it was, it included a chance to win riches, fame, and lots of hot wings. The warrior decided she would go to this… thing with Seong Mina.

She whistled a tune from God of War as she walked down a hall to her room door, only to find a ninja there when it was opened.

"This feels like something from a really bad joke," Sophitia said.

_FLASHBACK TIME!_

_Sophitia thanked the woman behind the counter graciously. Hualin nodded and smiled. "It's no problem at all! Please have a nice stay __in _room 15_!" Thinking the woman had walked off, Hualin turned around with a sadistic look on her face and murmured: "Little does she know, I gave her a skeleton key and it can open any door! She is very forgetful. Sophitia will go into someone else's room by mistake _**HAHAHAHAHhaha~*cough*-"**

"Ummm, might you appoint me to where the free food is," Sophitia interrupted. She had been standing there the whole time.

"Oh, through this door, all the way at the end of that hall, turn down to the left,"_ Hualin instructed. "Thanks!" Sophitia dashed off._

FLASHBACK END!

Taki leaped off of rose-colored bed, flipped in mid air, and landed in front of the blonde dramatically. "You have seen too much poor soul; it's time to take you out," Taki grabbed her by the arm and pulled her inside. "Oh, but I've already went and got some food," Sophitia told the woman. The Asian woman gave her a look for a moment, and promptly tied up her captive.

"So, what's with all of this stolen looking stuff on your bed?" Sophitia asked the ninja innocently. "It's none of your damn concern! Well, since you asked nicely," Taki decided to tell her. "Namco doesn't pay me enough for my tastes," She couldn't help but think how weird this would look from the outside _/I feel like a pervert…/_ and then she noticed how her prisoner really looked. And that my friends, was that of a very hot Greek chick! So you could say that the own woman's theory of being a pervert was true.

"You know I could—"

"_**I'M NOT A PERVERT!"**_Taki yelled aloud suddenly. _{To the author}_

"Oh what were you saying? Please continue…" Taki gestured for her prisoner to finish her statement. "I was saying (before that random outburst) that I will help you with your 'tastes' anyway that I can. But you have to stop being evil!" She had the most adorable entreating blue eyes; and Taki nearly said 'Yes baby!'

"**NO!" **The ninja yelled adamantly. She dramatically turned away, and turned on a (stolen) radio player that gave off an evil (Inspector-Gadget-bad-guy) tune. "Mudada, {_Translation: "It's useless,"}_ there's no way to stop the biggest heist of the year! I plan on busting the Nuke 'Em ball tournament tomorrow and steal all of the golden eggs for myself! I'll be filthy rich _**MUHAHAHAHAH**__~*cough-cough*_," Let's just say Taki was excited.

While this is going on, Sophi shrugged out of the ropes she was bonded by, and stops that random radio from playing that generic, evil music. She politely stepped to the oblivious woman and—

_***hug***_

Taki was shocked at receiving this affection. She hasn't had a hug since... _{Footage Not Found}_

_/And to think it would be from a total babe… I'm a lucky ninja~…/_

"Well, I'll think about it..." Taki told her, a bit shy. "Good!" Sophi clapped. She stepped back into the ropes and began to eat her DINNER. Taki gave a look as though she had just realized that the blonde could have escaped easily. _/She really is dense. What a warrior…/_

"Want some?" Sophitia offered a platter of lemon pepper chicken wings.

"Why the hell not," Taki smiled for the first time in _{Footage Not Found}._

/*/

_Roomy 7…_

Yun came back to the light side of the tunnel a few minutes later on Mitsurugi's bed.

"Yahhh, what happened," he yawned. "I would like to know the same thing," Mits asked. This scared the living hell out of the young man. "Aaah! I didn't know you were by me! Did anyone tell you how creepy you are?" He asked the older man. Yun relaxed {_because Mits was giving him a look like: _**O.o**_}_ and began to notice how sexy the older man is... Hair framing his face; which was even cuter with the concerned expression {_which was: _**O.o**}."On another topic," Mits began to speak. "Why the hell are you always after me? All you do now is cause a scene, and you never even fight me anymore?" It was an intense question. "If I didn't know any better; I'd say you were falling in love with me," Mits chuckled.

"In your nightmares Heishiro!" Yun spat at him, though he seemed to like the thought.

"I brought you something...That looks like food," Mits held up a Burger King bag. "Weirder than this particle of nourishment: Nightmare and Raphael were having a dance contest earlier!" They both laughed at the randomness, yet _Mama Luigi_ didn't think it was so funny. But it did alleviate some tension between them.

"So really, why don't you like me?" Mits asked. "It's not that I don't like you; I just...Always wanted a reason to be after you..." Yun turned away and blushed a bit _/He so cute when telling the truth!/ _"Oh yeah. You're what I'll cal a _'tsundere'_ in Japanese!" Mits laughed at the teen. "The hell is that?" Yun cocked his head curiously. Mitsurugi refused to go further into the term."Why didn't you ever tell me? I'm not that bad of a guy," _{Lying}_ "I'm sorry if it seemed that way, Yun. I'm surprised you said my first name so willingly!" He gave him a smile, which only occurred in battle after he wins. "Well, it's no biggie, really!" Yun was infected with the suddenly charismatic guy's smile.

"I think someone who nearly died of blood loss today deserves a manly hug!" Mits said affectionately and held open his arms. _/If my internet knowledge is correct; this theory should work! Come here Yun!/ _Yun shook his red-head fervently and even tried to push him away; but he was still pretty weak. Needless to say, Mits got that hug he wanted.

Mits could almost feel the heat of the boy's blush. "You're really warm," he commented and felt a hand over Yun's cheek, we all know he wasn't checking for his temperature. "Hey~! I'm alright... I'm not a kid ya know!" Mits told him how adorable it is when he has tantrums. "I Do _**NOT**_!" Yun goes into retard mode, his blush turning deeper.

Mits pulls him closer and sneaks a short kiss on the lips...which seemed like the only way to shut Yun up. Yeah, it worked. Blood spurted from Yun's nose. "So that's why you've been bleeding! You pervert! Why else would you have arterial bleeding from your nose?" Mits starts to laugh, and tenderly wipes the blood away from the embarrassed Yun. "Whatever! Y-You're the one who kissed me!" Yun accused the man which was totally beside the point.

"I never said I didn't like it," Mits growled _{Point One for the samurai! :3}_

"Mitsurugi... May I kiss you how I want to?" _/_**?**_/_ Mits was a bit confused _{didn't know there could be other kisses}_ Yun pulls him close, by the chin; lining his tongue along unimaginably soft lips… Mits moaned, wanting him to pass through and stop teasing him. The teen caught on to the demand and did as the samurai wished, willingly exploring every bit of his mouth _{they even high-fived tongues! :P}_

Yun gasps suddenly, surprised when he is gently laid onto the bed, his hands interlocked with the older man.

They break for air _{After 8 years}_. "I need you in my life Mits; I'm no one without you," Yun sighs. "It's the other way around," Mits whispers into the boy's ear.

/*/

_Somewhere outside…_

Cassandra walked out to get some fresh air; she was tired of this stuffy hotel, with its lovey-dovey crap and lack of T.V. _/Stupid crap!/_ She was strolling around the lobby, when she spotted Seong Mina by one of the beautiful waterfalls, admiring the water like a true hippie.

Cass walked over to her, with a slight grimace that wasn't due to a stolen T.V. "Hmph! Got tired of my sister for now huh? Since you're always with her," Cass said to the girl rudely. It was obvious that she was jealous of their relationship, especially since she knew Seong before Sophitia. "Why are so upset tonight Cassie?" The girl huffs and turns the other way. "Shouldn't you be running behind my sister right now?" The blonde retorted. Seong Mina wanted to ask why there was blood on her pajamas; but it looked like a story for another time.

"I'd much rather run after you Cassie; that would be pretty exciting!" Mina hints to her.

"W-What do you mean by that?" Cassandra stuttered_. /Do she really like me? Oh man ohman oh shi—/_ "I mean the Golden Nuke 'Em Ball Tournament tomorrow! We can train together," Seong offered and handed a flier to the feisty blonde.

"Right now! Well, okay," Cass invites her to her room so they could change clothes. "Thank you sooo much! We're gonna win this thing Cass!" Seong skipped happily along the girl to the hotel room.

_/Yea...The hottest babe in world wants to play a silly game for gold… (-_-) When will she notice me?/_

/*/

_Room # 20…_

Raphael entered into his daughter's room, and upon seeing that it was dim, assumed she was asleep.

"Amy darling?" He whispered, as he set the food bag on a nearby dresser. The Basketball-With-A-Mop-4-Hair always does the trick when Amy wants to sneak out at night; and Raphael always proved this to be true. The basketball of course, did not reply to his call, so he decided to leave some of the food for her later _{I hope Amy likes Long John Silver's!}_. He went and sat on the edge of the bed.

"Listen, Amy. I'm sorry about my treatment to you earlier, and I apologize." If the basketball could, it would have _*coughed*_. "I found someone that I really like; and though right now it might be hard for you to understand now, I like a man named Siegfried. Earlier, I was into a dance-off, and I realized how precious life is," The basketball did not understand.

"I realized I've been too hard on you," in response, the mop fell off of the basketball, and onto the floor…

Raphael continued with his speech. "Things will be different! Tomorrow, we will begin Phase 1 of Fun!" To foreshadow even further, the ball also rolled off of the bed, bouncing loudly. He picked up the basketball and set it on the pillow. He kissed Basketball Amy goodnight, which rolled off of the bed when he shut the door and wished her: "Sweet Dreams!"

/*/

_Room 28…_

"Siegfried? Where are you? I talked to Amy, and I brought you some..."Raphael trailed off.

This was because Siegfried walked out of the bathroom, with only a towel on...O_o

"Heyyyy… Is that Pollo Tropical? I love their food!" Siegfried asked excitedly about the food bag. "Umm, is there something wrong Raphael?"

The young man couldn't get a response on account that Raphael went to go crouch in a corner. _{This time, I don't even know why…}_

/*/

_Over in Roomy 10…_

"One more time please Maxi," Kilik pants. Maxi complies.

"The second way to find the two zeros of a quadratic function is: Opposite of _**'b'**_ (remember plus or minus) the square root of _**'b'**_ squared, minus 4 times _**'a'**_ times _**'c'**_!" Kilik writes down the formula on his paper… And he got the answer. "The zeroes are: Negative 4 and Positive 4!" He yells cheerfully, letting his Dunce cap fall to the floor_! {Don't laugh! This poor man never went to school!}_

"Simple as that, right? With that done, let's kiss," Maxi bounces on the bed and wrapped the other in his arms. He murmured sweet words of reassurance as he slipped the other's jacket off of his shoulder, and then his own. Maxi could feel his tension. Kilik was never used to being around him, half-bare… and this close… "Are you sure you wanna? I don't want to pressure you…" Maxi rumbled in a low tone. He leaned closer, returning to a tight embrace.

"I'm sure, Maxi." Before any random objections _{like with Ivy and Zassy in the previous chapter}_, the excited Elvis-wannabe tilted the saint's _{or whatever the hell he is}_ head slightly, and planted a sweet kiss on Kilik's lips. It was so sweet and innocent, even Nightmare _{who is heartless}_ would have 'awwwed' at them.

Kilik opened his eyes _{he was half afraid that his master was right}_. "Not so bad, was it bro?" Maxi whispered as he smoothed a thumb across the man's check-mark scar. "No… You taste kinda sweet…" Kilik said dazedly. He probably wouldn't have cared if Maxi told him that he stole some mints from the convenience store earlier, but Maxi didn't want to push his luck. Instead, he interlocked a hand with Kilik's.

"Let's go," he said as he tugged the man's arm like a kid.

"Where to? Are you up to something Maxi?" _{He was}_ "Of course not. Let's just go to the dining room. This place sure is pretty; I just want to look around it with you~!" _{Like I said, quick wits ran in his family}_.

Kilik agreed, and the two lovers were off to explore the hotel.

Little did they know, secret cameras in the room watched their every move, and had been for the past few chapters of everyone in the hotel _{please don't make me go into details ;_;}._

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

"Muhahahaha! We are going to be rollin' in dough Hualin! I mean; fangirls and boys are gonna kill to get a hold of these tapes! We can auction them off for millions! Guys and Girls Gone Wild ain't got nothin' on us!" Valeria cackled to the woman next to her as she surveyed Kilik and Maxi.

"I guess so," Hualin stated plainly. "What's the matter, for the past few chapters you've been mighty quite." Valeria commented. "I hate seeing you so… Not you! Please tell me?" She flopped herself onto the woman's lap.

"Well…" Hualin said. _{Unfortunately we are out of time!}_

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

?: Long $$ chapter! Jeez, this makes over 3,000 words!

Setsuka: Boo hoo! No one cares! _{Evil Grinch Stare Ho!}_

?: _*mumbles to self*_

Rico: lol…

Setsuka_**: WHAT DA F^CK YOU SAYIN'? WHAT SHE SAID RICO?**_

Rico: _*oh shi-*_


	7. Chapter 7: Rudely Interrupted

?: I-I know I haven't been here in a while…. And I know you guys must be angry….

Nightmare: _*cracks his knuckles*_ Kehihihihihi, you think so?

Raphael: I would help you, but you made me incapacitated in the story… too bad!

?: You sonofa-

Tira: Hi Nightmare! You sure were cool lookin' tonight! _*whispers to ?*_ Let me handle this…

Nightmare: You really think so? _*blushes*_

Tira: I know so…

Setsuka: How can Nightmare blush through his armor?

Talim: That my friend, is a weird natural phenomena about that man. Stick with us and you'll see it more often.

Cervantes: _*whispering*_ I heard he bathes in it and it doesn't rust or anything!

?: Ya don't say…?

**

* * *

****Chapter 7:**_ Rudely AND 'Rongly' Interrupted_

_/*/_

_Room 1!_

So you're wondering who the hell opened Zassy's door? Let's find out!

"_**OFF THE HIZZY!"**_

"Who the hell are you?" Ivy and Zasalamel asked the weird man at the door simultaneously.

"I'm the Goddamn Batman!"

"Uhm… Do we know you? I've never heard of a bat-man…" Zassy asked him. "You should. 'Cuz I'm Batman." The man replied to them in a relatively quiet voice as he came inside and shut the door. "Hey! I don't care if you're a 'catman!'" _{She spelled that 'rong'! Everyone know its Cat-man!}_

"No, you're thinking about Cat-woman. However, there is a Bat-girl," Batman replied calmly.

"Oh yeah, Halle Berry." Zassy agreed while he thought about Cat-woman.

"Forget that! You're ruining the only hentai moment in this whole damn series; and if you don't get yo 'retarTed' with a capital T ass outta here..." She slipped a small dagger from out of her bra. "Whoa..." was all Zasalamel could say.

"Have any one of you seen a freak running around here calling himself the 'Joker'?" Batman asked, almost oblivious to Ivy's awesome breast powers. "Nope," Zassy answered politely. "Oh. See you around. Hey, you guys know they're having a Golden Nuke 'Em Ball Tag-Team Tournament tomorrow! You two should totally pair up!"

"Really? That's sound pretty awesome... But why are you telling us this Batman?" Ivy asked.

Cuz I'm the **Goddamn Batman**! And plus the author ran out of a creative way to deliver this information to you guys; I heard you two were gonna be in here all night _**guurrrlllll..."**_ Batman snapped his fingers like a true ghetto black woman. _{The author knows this because it is seen daily}_

With the weird man known as Batman gone, Ivy and Zassy were now alone _{except for the Perv Cams}._ "Soo... You pulled that out of your bra?" Zassy finally asked the question on his mind. "Well sure! I keep plenty of stuffs in here!" To show him, she slipped out a Hello Kitty key chain, Blue's Clues' Notebook, and even a Captain Planet Ring. Last of all, she pulled out a special whip that was given to her as a birthday present by Cervantes.

_/Well, that can be a turn on if I squint my eyes like this.../_ The black man decided after staring at the whip. "How long has it been since you've been spanked?" she asked seductively.

"Hmmm... A few centuries ago... Not counting the time when that 90-year old lady with rheumatism..." Ivy thought it was a joke and laughed heartily. And then the black man started to laugh; and they were both having a great time.

And before you knew it _{or rather before they knew it}_ all of the gin was empty, and both of them had a lampshade over their heads _{even though there was only one lamp in the room}_ doing the Hokey-Pokey to an R. Kelly remix.

_{I'm leaving for now…}_

_

* * *

_

/*/

_Back in Room 28..._

"Eaahhhuuhhudduurr..." Raphael answered to the damn-near naked Siegfried.

_/Hmmm... He can't even speak English right now.../ *cough*_ Louis_*cough*_ quietly stepped over to _*cough*_Lestat_*cough*_ and knelt by his fellow _*cough*_vampire_*cough*. {Ricola: $0.99 get a bag for the author today!}_

"Hey Raph, I kinda wanted to talk to you about something. Are you okay; because it can wait and I'll take you to a nurse—"

**"NO! I DON'T WANT TO SEE AN OLD LADY'S TEATS!"**

"..._*sigh*"_ Siegfried went.

***BLAM!*** the door opened because Raphael had forgotten to lock it.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Wrong room," The vampire Armand apologized for intruding.

"I thought you were a guy named Louis going out—never mind." The vampire closed the door. "Anyways," Siegfried continued. He set a reassuring hand on Raph's shoulder, and the moment he did so, the other man turned around in a flurry, causing the German to lose his balance.

"Whoa!" Siegfried hold on the towel around his hips broke.

**"I DON'T WANT YOU NURSE GTFO**—oh heaven down _below_,"

Raphael had thought Armand was the nurse, and twisted around in an attempt to kill; but was granted a treasure far above his place. "Ahh! I'm so sorry Raphael, I—"As the younger blonde turned around to cover himself _{he would've failed anyway}_ Raphael stood suddenly and snatched the naked body into his arms.

"Raphael! What are you doing...?" Raphael asked himself the same question as he pulled Siegfried closer, and nuzzled fan-boyishly in the other's golden hair. He finally answered sexily into the younger man's ear:

"Trying to seduce _you_…"

Raphael managed to pull this line off in a sexy tone, so it was actually kind of cool; critics give him a _9/10_ _{A perfect _**10/10**_ is reserved for vampires}_.

"Did you have something to tell me earlier Siegfried?"

"...Well, you've already answered my question by now..."

"?...Siegfried, you wouldn't mind if I ask you a question as well," Raphael asked as he led both of their bodies towards the bed.

"A-And what might that be Raphael?"

_***BLAM***_ the door was smashed open again!

Cloud Strife was standing there with a wide smile on his face. "Hi Siggy! Oh, I thought you had my other sword that I let you borrow… I guess Vincent must have picked it up for me. Anyways… bye!" And he left out the door without realizing what the hell was happening. Or maybe he did and he didn't have a comment.

In other words, this was a very awkward situation; so the author decided to leave.

_

* * *

_

/*/

_Outside of the dining room..._

"Well, you heard about that tournament thingy too right?" _{Astaroth talking}_

"It sounds badazz enough for me to join!" _{Setsuka agreeing}_

"Just imagine! You can even have gold for participating!" _{Cervantes being random}_

A few members of the SC cast were discussing the grand tournament that would take place tomorrow with each other; they were hyped to the fullest about the aspect of free food, money and a luxurious hot spring.

Voldo was currently looking at the crowd with a confused face. What the hell was this 'tournament' everyone was so eager about? Whatever it was... the circus freak knew one thing was for sure:

_In a world full of free food..._

**Voldo will be there!**

Voldo said this to him in his mind hoping it sounded epic; of course it did sound as such, and so he was pleased.

_

* * *

_

/*/

_Near the hot springs area..._

"Jeez Maxi! Why are you in such a hurry to get here? We could have come later..."

"'Cuz we wasted too much time tryin' to get Tsurupettan Xianghua outta her room!" Maxi huffed _{She didn't want her and Amy to be discovered so she stayed put inside of her room…}_Kilik was wondering why he was being rushed to relax when Maxi turned on him with a serious face. "We have to train you for tomorrow's tournament!" Kilik was even more confused than ever as the two were greeted by attendants of the changing room that eventually led out to the springs.

Kilik excused them on the way they entered while Maxi headed for the exit towards the springs with a few robes. "Get along lil' doggy! We've gotta a lotta trainin' to do!" Kilik hurried along with the man, and they left to the all-male area just as fast as they had come.

"They sure are in a hurry," Cecilia commented. Her head had been reattached earlier so she was fine. "Seriously; that tournament thing must be on their minds," the second attendant Charade mentioned.

Not long after, the room was visited once again by a pair of two young women.

"Thanks again for being my partner Cass!" Seong Mina jumped in joy as she held Cassandra's hand. The blonde blushed a little at the sudden contact of the bouncy breasts on her arm. She died a little inside.

"Don't get me wrong, I just want in on some gold too!" The girl said with a typical tsundere line. Cecelia welcomed them warmly and Charade handed them some robes. "Thanks!" "Thank you…" The two women were off the co-ed area to practice their Nuke 'Em moves.

"Heyyyy I gotta an idea Cecelia! How 'bout we tell our bosses about how awesome everthing's going?" The woman considered this. "Yeah! That sounds awesome!" And so the plot continued on to somewhere else.

_

* * *

_

/*/

_In Meiga's Office {Second Floor}_

"Since we get off in about an hour, I was wondering if you wanted to stop by a place and get something to eat." Meiga was talking with Chester since his job was, for the most part, finished for the day. "Yeah, I don't have anymore clients to pick up; those main characters are crazy as hell!" They were crazy as hell, and you can see the raw stress on both of their faces.

"You should relax yourself a little; I don't think anything major will happen until tomorrow…" The brunette stood up from his seat and went behind the desk where Meiga sat tiredly. "I'll do that, you here makes me feel comfortable enough."

"Comfortable enough for another manly hug?" Chester cocked his eyebrow coolly. He looked into the man's eyes lovingly as he hugged him from behind the chair.

"As long as I can have a manly kiss with it," the samurai replied.

_2 minutes of deep manly kissing… _**The phone started to ring.**

"**God**_**damn**_**!"** Meiga cursed loudly. Although he somehow ended up sitting in Chester's lap, they tore their faces away for a moment so he could answer his office phone. "I love that pizza, but still… Hello, this is Meiga—"

"**Gyahaaaa! Meiga**! Lizardman came in and he _he_—" Charade was talking hysterically and there was obviously a very loud commotion downstairs. "Charade! Slow down and tell me: what's going on?"

"It's Lizardman; he's eating Cecilia—**again** and attacking the other employees! A few of the customers are helping, but he keeps re-spawning!" Yep, nuthin' there runs smooth…

"I'm on my way! Hang in there!" Meiga slammed the phone down on the receiver and grabbed his sword Murasame that was by the wall. Chester always left his daggers with Meiga and he had them ready to go.

"Chester, this sounds pretty serious…"

"I know; maybe we should call the Legendary!" _{gasp! plz}_

"You don't mean… that 90-year-old Lady with rheumatism?"

"Yeah," Chester grimaced. "We might need to call her in."

* * *

?: So I wonder what the hell is gonna happen in the hot springs area?

Maxi: Shouldn't _we _ask that question? You're the author?

?: Oh yeah… that's right.

Chester: We can't ever catch a break around this joint!

Meiga: Seriously…

?: I feel kinda bad for ya… I see what you mean and—

Batman: _**HI FRENS!**_

Kilik: I think he spelt 'friends' 'rong'.

Batman: You spelt 'wrong' 'rong' Kilik!

Cervantes: I'm this close to wringing both of yer necks!

Yun: And then?

Cervantes: And then I'll throw 'em to sea!

Mitsurugi: And _then…?_

Cervantes: And that's it.

?: Can you three please stop while you're ahead? I want to end this chapter now…

Yun: _**And then…?**_

Batman: **OFF THE HIZZY!**

Everyone (except Batman): _*wtf stare*_


End file.
